Olivia Munn‘s journey to motherhood has had a few bumps—and not just her baby belly.
During her latest appearance on SiriusXM’s Pop Culture Spotlight with Jessica Shaw, the 41-year-old actress, who is expecting her first child with comedian John Mulaney, opened up about how her pregnancy has “brought up” past body image issues.
The candid revelation came after host Jessica Shaw made a comment about the “deafening” self-doubt she feels as a mother, prompting Munn to say she’s heard similar concerns from friends who are parents and that she too has questioned herself during her pregnancy.
“It’s already hard enough to feel like you are not good enough, and that you can’t forgive yourself for things and the world doesn’t let you forgive yourself for things,” Munn said in the interview.
Now that Munn has started “this other chapter of my life,” she’s found herself struggling with self-confidence as a mom-to-be.
“I had a friend of mine, god love her, and she always has the best sense of style and so when she heard I was pregnant, she reached out and I said, ‘I’ve been wanting to talk to you specifically because you have such great style, like I need help with this,'” she recalled.
As she told her friend, “It’s just so hard, because I will Google search street wear maternity, and a lot of it comes up with these gorgeous women who are super skinny, and have this little bump, and everything is effortless.”
She added, “Rosie is great and I love Rosie, but that’s what I mean. I don’t have Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s body at all and that’s kind of… the first step in feeling like, ‘Oh if I am not handling maternity well, if I’m not looking chic and cool and effortless, and if my body is changing like this that means that I’m failing. That means that I’m already not doing things right.'”
For Munn, she dealt with body image struggles when she “first got into the public eye.” At the time, she said, she would hear criticism about her appearance and “try to own them myself” by laughing it off, though she would worry in secret.
“Being pregnant has brought up all those feelings because there is so much of like, ‘How am I supposed to do it right?'” Munn explained. “And I know there is no right, I understand that but it’s really hard, especially to have so many images in your face all the time of what truly looks like perfection.”
News of Munn’s pregnancy was confirmed by Mulaney, 39, during an interview on Late Night With Seth Meyers in September. “It is a very lucky thing to have met this woman,” Mulaney said of the actress, adding that their relationship has been “really beautiful.”